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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28103736">requiem</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/HowlingAlchemist/pseuds/HowlingAlchemist'>HowlingAlchemist</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Basically Dimitri cries: the fic, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, F/M, Flashbacks, Fluff and Angst, Fragile masculinity? Dimitri doesn't know him, M/M, Minor Felix Hugo Fraldarius/Sylvain Jose Gautier, Mourning, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Out of Body Experiences, Post-Blue Lions Route (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), Self Loathing, life threatening injury, none of the blue lions are good at dealing with grief</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 21:47:55</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>18,234</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28103736</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/HowlingAlchemist/pseuds/HowlingAlchemist</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>After receiving a life-threatening injury, Dimitri finds himself having an out of body experience, with the odds of him actually waking up growing smaller by the minute. As he watches the impact this has on his family and friends, Dimitri reflects on his current life, past actions, and gets to know a particularly interesting girl that has a surprising connection with his wife.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/My Unit | Byleth</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>60</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. unbeknownst to them</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This was meant to be a short, self indulgent one shot but turned into a massive three part angst fest. Oops.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Dimitri is aware something is wrong the moment his eye flutters open.</p><p>His body aches as he wills himself to rise from his bed, the bed that he does not recall going into in the first place. His head pounds as he rises, his hand reaching instinctively to it to try and ease the pain. It is then when he realizes he doesn’t have his eyepatch on. When he glances over to the nightstand it normally sat on whenever he retired for the night, it isn’t there. Odd.</p><p>Rubbing his eye, he swings his legs over the bed. The pain that erupts from his side is immediately apparent, but it seems to numb itself just before he can let out a groan. His hand clutches the place where the now numbed pain still lingers, trying to steady his breath as he does so.</p><p>Acting on the initial instinct he had when he first woke, he gets up, knowing that something is amiss. No matter how hard he tries, he can’t remember how he got here. He doesn’t recall going to bed, bidding farewell to Dedue, tucking his children in… things he always did before he went to sleep for the night. And as he leaves his bedroom and begins roaming the halls of his Fhirdiad home, something told him that he wasn’t even supposed to be in the castle in the first place.</p><p>For a while, the only thing he hears as he walks through the halls is his bare feet hitting the floor. He notices fairly early on into his voyage that he is wearing the undergarments that he normally wore underneath his usual attire; his long sleeve black shirt and pants. This only added to the oddity of the situation. What’s more, there wasn’t a single maid or servant or knight roaming the halls. He thinks he should have at least seen one by now.</p><p>Not long into his journey, Dimitri hears arguing, one of the voices being an all too familiar melody of a voice that he knows shouldn’t be here. Now in a full-on jog, Dimitri rushes to the voice of his Beloved, a voice he was <em>sure</em> was away at Garreg Mach for at least another month.</p><p>Arriving at the source of the arguing, Dimitri is taken aback by the bustling in the halls. His own knights seemed to have gathered to see what was going on, which made it difficult for Dimitri to get to the voice of his Beloved. No matter how many <em>excuse me</em>s and <em>pardon me</em>s he muttered, everyone seemed to worried on what was going on rather than making way for their King.</p><p>Finally pushing his way through, Dimitri saw the familiar head of hair that he had come to call his Beloved.</p><p>Byleth was angry—no, <em>furious</em>, but there was something amiss about her that Dimitri couldn’t quiet put his finger on. She looked like she had run all the way back to Fhirdiad from the monastery; still being in some of her regal wear. She trembled as she tried to push her way past Sylvain, who looked just as exhausted as she did, but he held his ground and prevented her from reaching the door behind him. Glancing at the door, Dimitri cursed to himself for not noticing it sooner; it was the door to the infirmary of the castle.</p><p>Everything began to click in place for Dimitri upon noticing that. Byleth, she wasn’t just angry, she was <em>distressed</em>. She was desperately trying to get to the room behind Sylvain, who wore a completely devastated expression on his face. Byleth <em>was</em> supposed to be at the monastery now, but something had to have happened that forced her to rush back here.</p><p><em>Someone</em> was in there. <em>Someone</em> was injured.</p><p>A million things began to race through Dimitri’s mind. He was angry, first and foremost. Who had allowed him to stay in bed while someone was hurt? How had no one informed him for so long that Byleth, his wife who worked a <em>several</em> days journey away, was able to get back here before him.</p><p>Too many questions, no possible answers coming to mind.</p><p>Swallowing, Dimitri made his way to his wife.</p><p>“You <em>have</em> to let me in there,” Byleth growled.</p><p>Dimitri reached his hand out to put on her shoulder. “Beloved—”</p><p>“You <em>can’t</em> let me stay out here!” Byleth yelled.</p><p>“The healers are working on him as we speak,” Sylvain tried to assure her, “It isn’t good to interrupt them.”</p><p>“Don’t feed me excuses, Sylvain.” Byleth’s teacherly tone audible even through her despair and anger. “I <em>need</em> to see him, <em>now</em>.”</p><p>“Listen, even if that weren’t true, I don’t want you to see him this way,” Sylvain tried to reason. “Seeing him isn’t going to do you any good—”</p><p>“Just let me see him!” Byleth tried to claw her way past Sylvain, but Dimitri noticed how her attempts were getting weaker. Sylvain stopped her easily. “Please, Sylvain.”</p><p>Dimitri noticed the quiver in her voice. His wife didn’t cry much but he knew tears were coming, and soon.</p><p>“I can’t, Byleth.” Sylvain stood his ground, even though it was clear he didn’t want to.</p><p>Byleth wept out a gasp before letting go of Sylvain, seeming to have finally figured out that she wasn’t getting into that room. “Then tell me,” she wept, “Is it as bad as everyone is saying?”</p><p>Sylvain’s silence was enough of a response.</p><p>And Byleth promptly responded to that silence. Dimitri noticed her begin to shake before Sylvain did, and attempted to grab her, but he missed. Byleth fell to the floor on her knees, hands in her face, trying to catch the tears trailing from her eyes. Sylvain gave a mournful look to her before crouching down to her level, placing a hand on her shoulder in an attempt to comfort her.</p><p>“Beloved…” Dimitri repeated, kneeling down to her level. She was so distraught; she seemed to completely ignore his presence. He knitted his eyebrows together before trying to embrace his wife.</p><p>He wasn’t expecting to phase through her.</p><p>Dimitri was so startled that he didn’t manage to catch himself when he passed through his wife and onto the floor. Scratch that, he nearly went <em>through the floor</em>. Somehow, he had managed to catch himself, and stood up immediately.</p><p>Beginning to tremble, he gaped down at his wife still crying with Sylvain by her side. He hadn’t noticed before, but he saw the faint rust color on Sylvain’s armor, which appeared to be rubbed off hastily. That look in Sylvain’s eyes… Dimitri shared a similar look during his five year exile during the war.</p><p>Just what the hell had happened?</p><p>Turning to the door Sylvain had been blocking, Dimitri walked towards it. Instinctively, he went for the doorknob, noticing too late that it didn’t matter, as he phased through it and entered the room.</p><p>It was a strange thing, staring down at himself.</p><p>Clerics rushed around his body in a hurry, the glow of white magic illuminating the air. Dimitri noticed how his body, repeat <em>his body</em>, trembled no matter how much the clerics tried to hold him down. From what Dimitri could tell, his body was unconscious, but some unknown force was making his body move.</p><p>Upon walking closer to his body, he saw why that was the case. On his bare chest, Dimitri saw thick black lines under his skin, ever so slowly making their way up towards his upper chest. The source of the lines appeared to be from a gaping wound on his left side, which oozed black and red blood. Watching the clerics, Dimitri figured that they were trying to stop the spread of whatever this was, all the while trying to stop the wound.</p><p>By the looks of it, the black lines appeared to be heading towards his heart.</p><p>Dimitri stepped back and held a hand against his mouth, half from shock and half from the vomit he thought would come out. But he quickly figured that without a body, that was impossible. He settled for running his hand through his hair, trying to comprehend what was happening.</p><p>Goddess, just what was happening?</p><p>Franticly, Dimitri looked around the room. He had only just noticed Mercedes was among them, her eyes blood shot from overuse of magic. Another cleric was trying to prevent her from going back to work, but Dimitri knew Mercedes, she wasn’t going to stop until he was healed.</p><p>Or dead.</p><p>Taking his eyes off of Mercedes, Dimitri’s eye circled around the room.</p><p>He wasn’t expecting to make eye contact with someone.</p><p>Now at first, he thought it was just a coincidence, but then he got a better look at the owner of the green eyes. The girl couldn’t be too much older than his daughter, maybe ten? But the longer he looked at her, the older she seemed; she radiated this mature energy. Her long, green hair matched her eyes, and nearly hit the floor below. Her purple dress was regal, with gold and pink and white accents that showed off more skin that Dimitri thought a girl her age should show.</p><p>For a moment, Dimitri thought he was hallucinating, some side effect dream of his body’s current state. But her tilt of the head and ever focused green pools made him change his mind.</p><p>So, he walked towards her. “Who are you?” He asked plainly.</p><p>She didn’t respond at first, but her ears twitched. Dimitri only realized now that they were definitely not like his own. “Hm… This is interesting.” She said.</p><p>“Are you going to gawk at me or answer my question?” It felt strange talking to a girl that was at least two heads shorter than him in such a tone, but truthfully, Dimitri just wasn’t in the mood.</p><p>The girl seemed offended. “Well, no need to be rude, I thought Byleth taught you better.” And then she floated, <em>floated, </em>towards his body, seeming to study it through a gap between the clerics. “The vast majority of your kind aren’t able to astral project period. But the fact that you are capable of accomplishing such a feat even with your body in this state, my! I have never seen anything of the sort.”</p><p>Dimitri huffed out a frustrated groan. Watching his wife be distraught and seeing his own body in this state was already enough to handle. But now he was seeing some girl that refused to answer his questions.</p><p>“Instead of marveling over, <em>whatever this is</em>, do you mind answering—”</p><p>Dimitri suddenly came to a stop upon the explosive pain erupting from his head. He brought a hand up to his head, trying to ease the pain. He was no stranger to headaches, but this was unlike anything he had ever had.</p><p>Glancing down at his other hand, Dimitri saw it was gone.</p><p>
  <em>Byleth’s embrace refused to let up, and, even though she really should have been going, Dimitri appreciated her hugs too much to let her go.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Smiling to himself, Dimitri ran his finger through her hair, keeping her head on his shoulder. The smell of her mint shampoo filled his nostrils as he admired how short she was.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Don’t want to go,” Byleth mumbled into his shoulder.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“I think if you stay away from the monastery any longer, Seteth will have your head, Beloved.” Dimitri hated being the voice of reason in this situation. He would love for his wife to never leave his side again, but she had duties to fulfill.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“I’ll miss you,” Byleth nuzzled into him, “And I hate not saying goodbye to Adelia and Mikhail.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“But you said goodbye to them last night, Beloved,” he would use his nickname for her as many times as he could while he still had the chance.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Not the same. I’m leaving now, not last night,” she said.</em>
</p><p><em>Dimitri chuckled. “Well, if they inherited anything from their mother, it’s their </em>definitely-not-a-morning-person<em> trait.”</em></p><p>
  <em>“Don’t sass me, Dima.” His wife warned. “Not my fault I have to leave at the crack of dawn.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Eventually, the two parted, but their hands remained held. Glancing behind his wife, Dimitri noticed the coachman getting annoyed at the delay.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Byleth’s incredible green eyes made contact with his singular blue one. “Three months of not seeing you or the children… It never gets easier.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“I know, Beloved.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Take good care of them while I am gone?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri smiled. “Beloved, with my dying breath.”</em>
</p><p>Dimitri inhaled so hard he fell to the floor. This time, he had managed to catch himself before he had started to phase through. His eye rebounded back to his hand, which was still completely see through, but slowly starting to come back. Once he had composed himself, he lifted his hand in front of his face, watching it as it slowly became visible.</p><p>“What the hell is happening?” Dimitri turned his hand to ensure it was all there.</p><p>“I believe this is what you humans call <em>your life flashing before your eyes.</em>” The green haired girl answered.</p><p>“I’m… dying?” Dimitri made eye contact with her once more.</p><p>“Not necessarily,” she claimed. “Your body is currently pivoting on the edge of life and death. Sometimes it sways more on one side then the other. When it sways towards the death side, it should be only then this happens.”</p><p>“And if I stay on that side?”</p><p>“Then you die,” the girl almost sounded sorrowful when she said it.</p><p>Rising to his feet, Dimitri looked at his body. “What happened to me?”</p><p>“From what everyone was saying, an ambush.” Dimitri appreciated that now she was answering his questions. “You were out with your most trusted allies, that retainer of yours, the angry one, the flirt, and the archer if what everyone else is saying is true.”</p><p>
  <em>So Dedue, Felix, Sylvain and Ashe then.</em>
</p><p>“It was supposed to be a simple training session, but enemies came in a swarm. Took you all by surprise. From what I understand, you had the worst of it.”</p><p>“And the others?”</p><p>“Injured, but alive. Much further from death than you.” She glanced back at his body. “You seemed to have taken the brunt of it; as far as I am aware, none of them were attacked with an Agarthan weapon like you. You were clearly their main target.”</p><p>“Agarthan?”</p><p>“Long story. They are the same people that killed Sir Jeralt.”</p><p>Dimitri’s eye widened at the claim. He recalled the day Captain Jeralt died far too well. No matter what faith magic was used, any concoction or elixir, the wound would not heal. Byleth made sure to try every possibility, even long after it was clear their father was gone, but nothing worked.</p><p>And he was attacked by the same type of weapon.</p><p>“If that is the case then, death is all but sure for me,” he said.</p><p>“As I said, that isn’t necessarily the case,” the girl repeated. “The Agarthans are not the strong force they once were, and their magic and weapons have suffered for it. They are not as much as a threat as they were during the war. As a result, their weapons have weaker effects.”</p><p>She pointed to where the weapon impaled him in the side. “This weapon’s poisonous magic is moving at a much slower rate than in Sir Jeralt’s case. The poison had managed to reach his heart in a matter of minutes. In your case, the magic has progressed at a much slower rate.”</p><p>Dimitri stood beside the girl, glancing down at his body. The dark lines of poison have managed to make it to just below his ribcage. Close to his heart, but still a ways off.</p><p>“You are not out of the woods yet, not by a long shot,” <em>Thanks for the boost of confidence</em>. “However, you are in a much better place than Jeralt was. Your friends acted fast enough, and your mages seemed to have learned a thing or two over the years on how to slow the progression. I am afraid I don’t know exactly how this poison works, but from what I can tell, these clerics have managed to slow the progression at least somewhat.”</p><p>Dimitri turned away from his body. If he stared at it for too long he was afraid he would go insane. “How do you know so much about this?”</p><p>“I’ve had to deal with the Agarthans for a long time,” the girl said. “They were a tricky bunch, there are still things I still don’t understand about them. But I’ve dealt with them long enough to know a few things.”</p><p>The girl made her way around in front of Dimitri, making eye contact with him once again. “Who are you?”</p><p>Dimitri wasn’t sure why he felt the need to ask the question. There was a part of him that still assumed this girl was just a hallucination, some figment of his imagination due to the state his body was in. But Dimitri was far too familiar with seeing ghostly figures that spoke to him… This girl felt different.</p><p>The girl blinked slowly before she answered. “I am Sothis, also known as the beginning.”</p>
<hr/><p>Being in the presence of a goddess that he had long disrespected was not something Dimitri ever thought he would have to deal with.</p><p>What did the goddess think of him, truly? He had spent years of his life taking life away, destroying the very thing the goddess created. He had killed so many in her presence. He could never count how many times he cursed her name. How many lives he tortured, that he relished in killing.</p><p>But if she did hate him for the things he had done, she didn’t show it. Sothis acted less like a goddess and more like an annoyed child. Not to mention her appearance was nothing like the ancient paintings and stations that he had seen before.</p><p>Why was she here, even?</p><p>Dimitri didn’t speak much to the goddess after she had revealed her name to him. Truthfully, he didn’t really know what to say. <em>What could he say</em>? The Goddess of Fodlan just revealed herself to him. He was surely the least worthy person in Fodlan to deserve that. Her introducing herself to him was enough to send him spiraling. Why him, of all people?</p><p>There were too many questions that he was sure he wouldn’t get immediate answers to.</p><p>Dimitri couldn’t handle staring down at his own body any longer, so he returned outside the room, with the goddess following behind him. Apparently, she too couldn’t bear to watch the clerics work tirelessly anymore.</p><p>But watching Byleth was even more difficult.</p><p>She was so heartbroken, more heartbroken than Dimitri had ever seen her. She sat on the floor outside the infirmary, Sylvain sitting next to her, as she stared off into distant space. Her eyes were puffy red from crying, and she sniffled occasionally, her breathing unsteady. She was trying to piece herself back together, but it was obvious that she was anything but stable.</p><p>Dimitri was thankful that Sylvain stayed by her side the entire time. He left briefly to get out of his bloodied armor, and then returned to keep Byleth company while the clerics worked on his body. If Dimitri ever recovered from this, he would have to thank Sylvain for not leaving his wife alone.</p><p>He hated not being able to comfort Byleth himself, but he couldn’t leave her. He settled for sitting directly in front of her, imitating that she was looking at him. If he concentrated hard enough, Dimitri was able to keep his hand on hers without it phasing right through it. Sothis didn’t stay far away either, settling for floating near or around Byleth, kicking her feet.</p><p>In the hours that they sat there, Dimitri had learned quite a bit of information about what exactly happened. They were attacked by a group of at least ten men, each skilled in magic and another weapon. Sylvain came out the most uninjured due to the fact that the men struck and killed his horse, and during the fall the horse fell on top of him. Sylvain was already so weak by that point that he didn’t have the energy to lift his steed off. According to a cleric, Ashe was the least hurt after Sylvain, receiving minor injuries and a concussion.</p><p>Felix and Dedue were not as lucky. Felix took the title Shield of Faerghus to heart, and tried to protect Sylvain while he was pinned down by the horse. He had received significant burn marks on his right arm and shoulder, the same arm he used to swing his sword. He also had a few broken ribs and nose. Dedue had received the most severe injuries out of Dimitri’s friends. He had suffered a shattered leg, and was struck in the back with a spear. He came back to the kingdom unconscious, but was expected to make a full recovery.</p><p>Dimitri was another story.</p><p>No one was really saying anything, but Dimitri saw himself. He wasn’t a fool; he was inching closer and closer to death as the hours dragged on. Whatever weapon they used on him; it was killing him.</p><p>Dimitri shut his eye and sighed. He looked over to Sothis, <em>the goddess of Fodlan,</em> as she kicked her legs in the air next to Byleth. She looked bored.</p><p>Staring at her and his wife side by side, Dimitri realized how similar they looked. Their eyes were the same shape. Their hair both had a strange shade of green, different but close enough. Event their mannerisms were similar. Dimitri could have very well mistaken the goddess for a younger version of his wife.</p><p>“So… are you Byleth’s… mother?” The idea of demigods wasn’t completely out of the ordinary to him. Well, wasn’t too out of the ordinary considering he was speaking to the goddess of Fodlan. Dimitri believes he recalls a legend he heard as a child that this ancestor, Blaidydd, was a half-blood.</p><p>Sothis laughed. Great, now she thought he was an idiot. “No, no. We are one, you see. The same being.”</p><p>“So, is Byleth a goddess then?” Dimitri asked.</p><p>Sothis hummed. “I am not quite sure what she is, exactly. She is an anomaly, for sure. But I wouldn’t go as far as to call her a goddess. She is still human, as she ages and scars, but she still has godlike abilities.”</p><p>“Excuse me, <em>godlike abilities?”</em></p><p>“Yes. She doesn’t have as much power as I, but I must admit, her ability to rewind time has improved over the—”</p><p>“<em>What.”</em></p><p>“Oh, perhaps I should have eased into that.”</p><p>“What do you mean <em>rewind time?”</em></p><p>“Just as I said!” Sothis replied. “What, you mean to tell me the possibility never crossed your mind before? She tore a hole through the sky and stepped through it with an entirely different hair color for crying out loud! How out of the ordinary could rewinding time be?”</p><p>Dimitri doesn’t respond. He <em>can’t </em>respond. They’ve been married for what, seven years now? How <em>could</em> this be the first he has heard of it?</p><p>“You really never considered it, have you?” Sothis asks. “You mean to tell me you never wondered how she was so strategic? How she knew the movements of your enemies long before they even did? How she managed to save each of your classmates, not to mention <em>you</em>, right when you were about to perish? You <em>really</em> never questioned it?”</p><p>If he weren’t astral projecting and talking to the goddess of Fodlan at this very moment, he wouldn’t have believed it. His wife? Rewinding time? It couldn’t be possible.</p><p>But the more he thought about it, the more he realized it <em>could</em> be possible. He thinks back to all the times his friends have had close calls, not to mention all the times <em>he</em> had close calls. He can recall an axe narrowly avoiding severing his arm, an arrow missing his head by a hair, a dagger just to the right of his heart…</p><p>It made sense. It made <em>too</em> much sense.</p><p>And then he thinks of all the times they have had close calls. The countless times he and his classmates were nearly killed in the fields of battle.</p><p>Just how many times has Byleth seen them die?</p><p>Before Dimitri could question further, the door to the infirmary opened. Byleth and Sylvain almost instantly stood as the clerics came out of the room, looking exhausted beyond belief. Mercedes was the last to leave the room, looking worse than the rest, rubbing her temples with her fingers.</p><p>“Are the others being worked on, Sylvain?” She asks simply.</p><p>“Yes.” Sylvain answers directly.</p><p>“Good,” she answers. “I doubt any of us have any magic left in us to heal them. I think we will be out of commission for a few days, at least.”</p><p>“What about Dimitri?” Byleth asks, voice quivering.</p><p>Mercedes shuts her eyes slowly. Dimitri knows that she was dreading this question being asked.</p><p>“We have done everything we could,” Mercedes replies.</p><p>“But what of his condition?” Byleth repeats.</p><p>Mercedes shuts her eyes again. Dimitri sees Sylvain take notice of this, a look of dread gracing his face.</p><p>“Your Grace—”</p><p>“Mercie.” Byleth’s hands shake as she brings them to her chest, gripping at her garb. “Will Dimitri be alright?”</p><p>“I don’t know,” Mercedes answers quickly. “We have healed him all we could but… Whatever magic they used on him… It acts like a poison, we think, but no matter how fast we heal, it doesn’t disperse. We can’t remove it from his body no matter how hard we try, only slow the progression.”</p><p>“So, what does this mean for him, then?” Sylvain asks, as Byleth is too shocked to speak.</p><p>“We have ceased the progression for now, we think,” Mercedes replies. “But the magic that has been in his body has done damage to his entire system. I… I don’t know if it is something he can recover from.”</p><p>The last words she speaks struggle to come out, and Mercedes looks devastated with every syllable she speaks.</p><p>But Byleth looks broken beyond imaginable. She doesn’t cry, doesn’t make a sound. She only stares out into space, mouth agape, her eyes completely dead.</p><p>Mercedes huffs from exhaustion. “I will continue to try and heal him, when I am able,” she sounds defeated. “He is not awake, but you are free to see him.”</p><p>Byleth doesn’t respond. Mercedes sighs, tears forming in her eyes. “I am sorry… Byleth.”</p><p>Dimitri wishes this wasn’t one of the rare times his wife’s former students referred to her by name.</p><p>Mercedes leaves shortly after that, not saying anything else. Sylvain does not leave Byleth’s side, but she hardly acknowledges him. Sylvain continues to remain by her side even as she slowly enters the room where Dimitri’s body rested.</p><p>Dimitri follows behind them.</p><p>When he sees his body again, it looks worse than before. His body has stopped trembling and shaking from the magic, but now he remained completely still, almost lifeless. The bottom half of his body was covered by a blanket, ceasing its coverage at his bandaged upper chest, which barely rises up and down. His face has a slight expression of pain on it, but mostly he just looks completely still.</p><p>Byleth continues to not say anything. Instead, she settles for kneeling on the floor beside his bed, her fingers reaching for his hand. They brush over his hand almost gracefully, before recoiling. Why, he doesn’t know.</p><p>She remains like this for some time, with Sylvain not saying a single word beside her.</p><p>“I apologize, Sylvain,” are her first words. “I see why you didn’t want me to come in here now.”</p><p>“Byleth, don’t apologize,” Sylvain replies. He doesn’t look as devastated as Byleth, but the look of dread is heartbreaking.</p><p>“I have to tell the children,” she says with her voice cracking.</p><p>“Please, don’t push yourself,” Sylvain pleads. “That can wait until tomorrow.”</p><p>“No,” she responds quickly. “I have to tell them right away. Hopefully they aren’t asleep yet—”</p><p>“Byleth, please.” Sylvain begged. “You’ve been through enough today. Allow yourself to rest—”</p><p>“I <em>can’t, </em>Sylvain,” Byleth snaps. “My husband every well may not live until tomorrow, I cannot afford to wait.”</p><p>Byleth lets out a helpless gasp. “I’m sorry,” she says. “I really have been letting out all my anger on you today, haven’t I?”</p><p>Sylvain’s eyes look glossy and broken. “By, I don’t blame you, I…” He pauses and then huffs, wiping his eyes. “Sorry, I…”</p><p>Byleth places a hand on his shoulder. “Go be with Felix, Sylvain, hopefully he is healed by now,” she says. “Please, don’t worry about me. I will do my best to go rest, after I tell the children.”</p><p>Sylvain swallows, eyes still glossy, before nodding. He then leaves the room, waiting until he is out of Byleth’s sight before she begins to cry.</p><p>And she does the same.</p><p>Dimitri watches with tears falling as his wife weeps at his bedside, letting everything out. It is in this moment when he notices Sothis for the first time. She stands by Byleth’s side, watching mournfully as her companion sobs.</p><p>But Dimitri is frozen, and all he can do is watch.</p>
<hr/><p>Dimitri dreaded being here just as much as Byleth.</p><p>The two stood right outside of the room their children would play in, side by side, although Byleth was not aware of this fact. He had to be here for this moment. Dimitri, with his pessimist nature, always feared that this day would come; that Byleth would have to explain to their children that he was dying. But he never expected it to <em>actually</em> come, especially so soon into his children’s lives.</p><p>Byleth inhaled deeply, Dimitri following shortly after, before she opened the door.</p><p>Annette’s face lit up the moment she made eye contact with Byleth, but that happiness quickly subsided when she saw the look on Byleth’s face. The dread appeared on her expression shortly after. Her eyes then quickly dashed away, not having the strength to look at her former professor any longer, and looked to the two little figures playing with a set of toy knights and monsters.</p><p><em>Goddess</em>, Dimitri loved his children so much.</p><p>He spotted his daughter first, her lively and energetic nature always catching his eye. Her off-white hair illumined the room as it bounced off of her shoulders, with her green eyes shining just as bright. Her skin remained tan even in the cold, sunless weather of the country, something that she always complained about. It seemed that today was no exception, since she was wearing the bright blue scarf gifted to her by her Uncle Dedue.</p><p>His son’s personality couldn’t have been more different, but that didn’t prevent them from being the best of friends and siblings. He was sitting on the ground, twiddling his thumbs among the array of toy knights. It terrifying, just how much he looked like Dimitri at that age: the blonde hair, cool, blue eyes, and not the mention the Crest of Blaidydd that he had passed down. Due to his Crest being that of a Major variant, his son was always extra careful, leading to his timid and calm nature.</p><p>But Dimitri loved every single thing about them.</p><p>Dimitri never thought that he would have children. He had never wanted them before, fearing they would end up just like him. Even if he did wish to have children, who would ever want to bring them into this world? And who would ever want to have children with him?</p><p>Byleth changed that. And now that he was living in a warless world and a wife he loved more than anything, he was willing to push his fears aside and try.</p><p>And now that he actually had two children of his own, he now understands why people sacrifice so much for them. He would put his children’s wellbeing above his own at the drop of a hat. If anything came between him and his children, he would turn back into that murderous monster he swore to never let see the surface again. That is how much he loved his children.</p><p>But now he had practically abandoned them, and he left Byleth—alone—to explain why.</p><p>His daughter, who was once too focused on her toy knights and monsters to care about anything else in the room, dropped everything at the sight of her mother. “Mama!” She leaped for joy as she ran towards Byleth.</p><p>“Adelia,” Byleth forced a smile as she bent down to her level, scooping her up in her arms. Her little brother wasn’t too far behind, wrapping his tiny arms around both his mother and sister. “Mikhail…”</p><p>“What are you doing here, Mama?” Adelia says as she ceases her hug. “Papa said you wouldn’t be back for a while!”</p><p>Dimitri sees Byleth begin to crack at the word <em>Papa</em>, but she snaps back just as quickly. “Mama had to come back early,” she says. Her eyes wander to Annette, who is still in the room, but understands with one look that it was time for her to leave. With a sorrowful nod, Annette heads for the door, wiping her eyes as she shuts it behind her.</p><p>The moment Annette left the room, Dimitri saw Byleth’s strong demeanor fade. He heard her give out a whimpered sigh before focusing back on her children.</p><p>“Adelia, Mikhail, listen to me,” Byleth’s eyes were already starting to water.</p><p>His children looked to their mother with wonder in their eyes. Adelia blinked a few times, confused at her mother’s sudden mood change. Mikhail tilted his head. “What’s wrong, Mama?” For a three-year-old boy, Mikhail was very observant.</p><p>Byleth sniffled. “Mama had to come home early because Papa is hurt.” She tried to say in a strong voice.</p><p>“What happened?” Adelia looked immediately worried.</p><p>Byleth hesitates, and Dimitri knows she is trying to choose her words carefully before she blurts something out that will only upset them more. “He was hurt by some bad people. They tried to attack your Papa and your uncles while they were training. Papa… He is very brave; he protected your uncles from the bad men.”</p><p>“Uncle Fefe? And Uncle Sylvie?” Mikhail asked.</p><p>“Yes, and Uncle Dedue and Ashe,” Byleth added, “They are all hurt too, but they will be fine. But your Papa… He was hurt, badly.”</p><p>Byleth inhales.</p><p>“Listen to me, you two,” Byleth closes her eyes. “You both have to be strong, okay? Things are going to be very hard for a while. Your Papa and I went through the same thing when we lost our own Papas. You are going to be sad, and confused, but you have to be there for each other, alright?”</p><p>“But what about Papa?” Mikhail asked, not being tricked by Byleth’s attempt to deter the subject of their father.</p><p>“Auntie Mercie and the other clerics are doing everything they can for Papa,” Byleth answers quickly. “Papa isn’t awake right now, but he is still fighting… fighting so he can see you two again. But there is only so much that Auntie Mercie and Papa’s determination can do.”</p><p>“But papa will be okay, won’t he?” Adelia nodded to herself. “Papa is strong, he will be okay, right?”</p><p>Dimitri saw Byleth’s lip quiver. She couldn’t hold up her strong act at that point anymore. “We don’t know, Adelia,” she says honestly. “We… We don’t know.”</p><p>Byleth is weeping openly now, although she is still fighting a smile. “You two may not understand; you have never had to deal with something like this before. But Papa might not wake up. That’s why—That’s why you two need to be there for each other, alright? We will get through this, together, but you need to be strong, understand?”</p><p>Dimitri notices Adelia begin to cry, but she nods. Mikhail nods shortly after, although, as intelligent as he is for his age, Dimitri doubts he understands completely.</p><p>Byleth blinks before opening her arms once again. “Come here,” she says. Instantly, her children run into her arms once more, the three of them weeping against each other, fearing the unknown.</p><p>And the sight makes Dimitri hate himself even more than he already does. How <em>dare</em> he leave his family behind like this. How <em>dare</em> he make Byleth have to explain the concept of death to their children, something he swore they would never have to deal with. He finds himself cursing his name, shaking violently at the sight.</p><p>That anger quickly turns into sadness, and he doesn’t know what to do with himself. But he finds his spiritual body moving before he has time to think. Slowly focusing on his current form, he wraps his arms around his wife and children, doing his best to hug them despite his current state.</p><p>None of his family knows that he is there with them, but being there makes Dimitri feel a little better.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. take me back in time to love you</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Updated the tags and rating for this chapter. Realized things are going to get quite a bit more intense, so that is the reason for the rating up.</p><p>c/w: self loathing, lots of sadness, swearing (thanks Felix), upsetting scenes. Just Dimitri being Dimitri. Kinda comes with the territory.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Dimitri is growing increasingly more tired of the ‘life flashing before your eyes’ thing.</p><p>Part of him thinks that he shouldn’t be annoyed; the vast majority of the memories he has seen so far are happy ones. He figures out quickly that his memories are going backwards, with the ones that he has recalled so far being events that have happened rather recently, within the past year or two. Many good things have happened in that time; the rebuilding of Duscur, watching his children grow up, the happy memories he had made with Byleth…</p><p>But Dimitri knows it is only a matter of time before unpleasant memories begin to arise. And with each new memory he recalls, he dreads the ones that could come next.</p><p>It also doesn’t help that the recalling of memories is only happening because his body continues to peter on the edge of life and death. So, recalling these memories, as happy as they are, is a sign that he isn’t getting any better.</p><p>Dimitri tries his best to avoid going to see his physical form, mostly because going to see that means he is going to see Byleth. She practically hasn’t left his side since he was injured, only leaving to be with her children from time to time. But other than that, she stays, even sleeping there and having people bring food for her. It is a heartbreaking sight, to say the least.</p><p>He also quickly finds out that he is not the biggest fan of seeing himself in the third person. Mostly because his body looks <em>terrible</em>. He knows Mercedes and the clerics have done all that they can, but Dimitri swears he looks sicker by the day.</p><p>So, Dimitri finds himself by his children’s side most of the time. It is difficult still, but not as difficult as watching Byleth. It is very clear that his children are upset and not themselves, but at least their young energy and innocence is keeping them at least somewhat sane.</p><p>He still didn’t have the courage to go see the friends he was injured alongside with.</p><p>The goddess is typically someone he avoids, if he is being honest. But to his credit, it isn’t entirely his fault. Sothis rarely, if ever, leaves Byleth’s side, and choses to keep her company even if Byleth is not aware of it. The few times Dimitri has seen her outside of the infirmary, she claims it’s to make sure he is not dead, and she just as quickly returns to Byleth’s side. It is a strange setup they have, to say the least.</p><p>But truthfully, Dimitri is afraid of the goddess. How could he not be? He knew he must have been damned by her hand, surely, so how could he face her? He doesn’t blame her; he knows he has been damned by his own actions. She was just doing what she needed too. But even if it wasn’t her fault, he was still scared to see her. Knowing that she likely had the power to destroy life as he knew it with the snap of her finger terrified him. If he ever were to recover from this, he doubts he would ever be comfortable being in the presence of anything relating to her for the rest of his life.</p><p>But judging by the state of his body, it seemed he was not going to recover anytime soon. How long had he been in this state, anyway? He could not sleep as he was now, so he found himself having an increasingly difficult time telling how long it had been. Was it a week? A month? He didn’t know, and the thought of not knowing terrified him.</p><p>At times, he finds himself having a difficult time remembering what he was doing. So much of his time in this form has been doing the same thing: watch his children, check on Byleth, walk around the castle, repeat. It felt as if he was living the same day over and over, making telling time even more difficult than it already was.</p><p>To try and keep some sense of time and keep hold of his current day to day (spiritual?) life, he finds himself reflecting. He reflects on his memories, the effect his state has on his family, his friends, his people… And he quickly finds out just how much his life means to them.</p><p>It’s a strange feeling, to say the least, having once longed for death and seeing just how much you matter after all.</p><p>And when his next memory comes, and he feels the rush of pain burst in his mind, he reflects on someone that he doesn’t expect to.</p><p>
  <em>He and the children had surprised Byleth at the monastery.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It was a rather impromptu trip, he admits, but one he is always willing to make. It wasn’t every often his kingly duties allowed him to come to Garreg Mach, especially this unexpectantly. But seeing Byleth’s surprised face was worth it every time.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri and the children had arrived at the monastery earlier that day. Mikhail was about a year and a half at the time, this being the first time at the monastery where he could actually get around somewhat. Adelia loved walking hand in hand with him, staring in awe at the sights the monastery had to offer.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>On this particular night, Byleth had excused herself and went off somewhere. Dimitri brought it upon himself to put his children to bed, which was rather easy from the day full of activities for the two. He recalls smiling as they both drift off to sleep soundly.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It is when the two are asleep when he leaves to go find his wife, longing for sleep as well.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He checks all the usual places; her office, Seteth’s office, the training hall, but he can not find her. On his way out of the training hall, finishing his route of the typical places, he decides to head to the church for his next stop.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And it is there where he finds Byleth. He would have easily missed her if it weren’t for her familiar head of green, sitting in a pew in the church. He smiles upon finding her, and makes his way over to where she is seated.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He only realizes when he gets closer that she is speaking to someone, but he does not see anyone nearby.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Approaching from behind her, Dimitri placed his hand on Byleth’s shoulder. She looked up at him smiling. “The children are asleep, Beloved,” he says.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Byleth places a hand over his. “Good, they had a busy day, didn’t they?” She remarks.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri hums. “Busy, but blissful.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“I could tell,” Byleth says, turning slightly to face him. “Adelia is typically very excited all the time, but I think today topped it.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri laughs. “She was quite happy to see you, wasn’t she?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Very,” Byleth smiles. “And of course, you were too, Dima.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Well, I haven’t seen you in a month, of course I was,” he smiles down at his wife. Her green pools were vibrant even in the dimly lit cathedral.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Goddess, was she beautiful.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Who were you speaking to just now?” He asks. “Was I interrupting?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Oh, no, you didn’t interrupt anything,” Byleth says. “I was just praying.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Praying?” He asks.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She nods. “I suppose it didn’t sound much like a prayer though, didn’t it?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri flattens his lips. Removing his hand from her shoulder, he walks around and sits beside her on the pew. “Well, not like any praying I’ve ever heard.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Seteth tells me the same thing,” she says. “He means well, I know he does, but he always gripes about that. He says they aren’t a good example of praying. But…”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri tilts his head. “But?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Is there really a wrong way to pray?” Byleth asks. “I know most people do it a certain way, but it just doesn’t feel right to me. I just… I don’t view the goddess the same way as others do, I guess.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“How do you view her, then?” Dimitri was never very religious, but he always had a clear vision of the Goddess of Fodlan. He always imagined her as this matronly figure; opening her arms to comfort you at one moment, smiting you the next.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“I guess… I view her as a friend,” Byleth stares at her lap.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“A friend?” He questions.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Yes,” Byleth says. “The Goddess is supposed to be there for you, isn’t that what we are told? So, while I can ask for blessings and guidance, I feel like that would get rather repetitive for her. So, I like to tell her about myself, sometimes. I’ll tell her about my day, what my plans are, maybe tell a joke every once in a while. But then I’ll tell her about other things too. I’ll tell her how Mikhail is beginning to crawl, or how Adelia learned her first spell, or how you are such a huge dork—”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Hey!” Dimitri whips his head to look at her.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“I’m kidding, I’m kidding!” She laughs.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She settles back down before continuing. “Anyways, I guess that’s just how I feel about her. Of course, after telling her all this, I thank her for it, for always looking out for us. But I tend to spend more time just chatting with her than that.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She rubs the back of her head. “I don’t know. I guess I can see why people find it weird.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Well, I definitely never taught of my relationship with the Goddess that way,” Dimitri admits. “But I don’t think it’s weird. You are just more comfortable with the Goddess than most.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Byleth turns to him and smiles. “I suppose you may be right.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She does it wordlessly, but she intertwines her fingers with his. “Thank you for understanding, Dima.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri chuckles. “You are my wife, I kind of have to.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Byleth slaps him on the shoulder, causing the couple to laugh.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Well,” he says, “Do you want to talk more with the Goddess? Or are you ready to retire for tonight?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Byleth stands, Dimitri following shortly thereafter. “No, I just about finished. Let’s head to bed.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And together, hand in hand, the two make their way to their bedchambers.</em>
</p><p>When Dimitri comes too, he has a headache stronger than usual, and for more reasons than one.</p><p>But the memory gives him time to reflect, and he realizes that perhaps his judgement has been completely wrong this entire time.</p><p>So, he goes to see Sothis.</p><p>He convinces her to leave Byleth’s side for a moment, not wanting to be in his body or her presence. He takes the goddess to the castle courtyard rather subconsciously, only stopping when he realizes just how far they had gone from the infirmary.</p><p>When he turns to face Sothis, she looks rather annoyed. “So, what is it you wanted to discuss?” She asks.</p><p>He pauses for a moment. “What exactly are you to Byleth?” He finally asks.</p><p>She lets out a frustrated huff. “I told you, we are one,” she answers. “We are the same being, I am her and she is me.”</p><p>Another pause. The silence is unsettling. “What brings this question up again, if I might ask?” Sothis fills it.</p><p>Dimitri doesn’t answer right away, but eventually he finds his words. “I recalled another memory,” he starts. “And it got me thinking about… you… and Byleth, I suppose.”</p><p>For the love of Fhirdiad, speaking to her was difficult. Nervously, he looks to her. Sothis raises an eyebrow as if encouraging him to continue, so he does.</p><p>“For as long as I have known Byleth, she has never treated you like how one normally would,” he wonders a bit. “Normal people would simply pray, but Byleth would speak to you as if you two were catching up. Normal people tense in the presence of the church, Byleth would remain completely casual. And, now that I have met you myself, I can see why.”</p><p>Another eyebrow is raised by the goddess. “Just what is that supposed to mean?” She asks.</p><p>Dimitri tenses, but he tries to snap out of it. He must stick to his gut. “What I mean is… Byleth has always viewed you as a friend. I, on the other hand, have always cowered in fear at your very mention. How could I not? In the church, you are <em>meant</em> to be feared. But I realized, both from my memories with Byleth and from my meetings with you, that you are not one to be feared at all.”</p><p>When Dimitri looks to Sothis again, she looks… surprised, almost. “I… I see,” she says.</p><p>Dimitri flattens his lips before speaking again. “Tell me, if you and Byleth have always been one, could you communicate?”</p><p>Sothis pauses now. “Used to,” she says regretfully. “We haven’t spoken in several years.”</p><p>“I’m… sorry,” Dimitri responds.</p><p>“It was inevitable,” Sothis crosses her arms. “It had to be done eventually; it was regretful for us both, but there was no avoiding it at the time.”</p><p>“So, what were you and Byleth, then?”</p><p>Sothis doesn’t respond for a moment. Instead, Dimitri sees her look off, pondering her next words. “If you want the truthful answer,” she finally speaks. “She was the closest friend I ever had.”</p><p>At this, Dimitri frowns. All this time, he had thought that the goddess—no, <em>Sothis</em>—was this powerful figure that needed to be feared. There were two choices in this world: follow her example, or face her wrath. But the little girl in front of him now was nothing like that. She was more human than most people he knew, if he was being honest.</p><p>And here he was, someone that she could actually talk to for the first time in however long, <em>fearing</em> her. He was petrified of a girl who longed for her friend.</p><p>Dimitri shuts his eye before stepping closer her. He doesn’t realize just how much he had kept his distance from Sothis until he is looking right at her. “I know I am not my wife,” he says. “And I know that I can’t replace the relationship you two had. But… I would like to continue that friendship, if you would allow me.”</p><p>Sothis snaps her head to him as he continues. “Byleth never told me of the bond you two forged, but I know that she misses you too. I don’t know why you two can no longer speak, and I am sorry for it, but please. Let me keep my wife’s best friend company, while she cannot.”</p><p>There is a long beat of silence now, so long that it makes Dimitri tense with worry. Did he say something wrong? But before he can question any further, Sothis begins to laugh, holding her stomach as she floated in circles, wiping her eyes.</p><p>Great, the goddess <em>definitely</em> thought he was an idiot now.</p><p>“You humans are so peculiar,” she finally speaks through the giggles. “But I must admit, I appreciate the sentiment.”</p><p>Dimitri finally ceases tensing. “I suppose the situation we are in isn’t very good for either of us, is it little Kingling?” She grins. “Keeping each other company, why, that might just make things a little bit easier.”</p><p>Dimitri chuckles. “I apologize for not suggesting it sooner, madam.”</p><p>“Oh goodness, don’t get started on that apologizing streak,” she chides. “The amount of times I have heard you apologize to Byleth over <em>every. Little. Thing.</em> I stopped counting ages ago.”</p><p>Dimitri laughs. He can see where Byleth got her sass from.</p><p>“Also, none of this <em>madam</em> talk,” She says. “Sothis will be just fine, alright?”</p><p>Dimitri huffs out a laugh. “Okay, Sothis.”</p>
<hr/><p>
  <em>Dimitri wishes that getting himself injured wasn’t such a common occurrence.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He remembered once when he was little, one of the castle guards whispered about a supposed curse that havocked the Blaiddyd line. While most other rulers in Fodlan stayed in power for most of their lives, the Blaiddyds were not so lucky. At the time, Dimitri didn’t believe in this so-called curse. But it was only a matter of time before he realized that perhaps his line was cursed after all.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri never met his grandfather, Alexandre Klaus Blaiddyd; he had died when his father was young. Dimitri’s own father… well, Dimitri knows far too well that he did not live a full life. And Dimitri himself… It seemed that death always loomed over his head.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He supposed it was only natural that he would come to fear it, especially now that he had reasons to live. But regardless, death still had a way of toying with him.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He recalls waking up, head on fire with pain, but willing his eye open anyway. After blinking a few times to adjust to the afternoon light, he sees her; his wife sitting at his bedside, reading a book. He is confused, needless to say he doesn’t recall what made her sit beside him, or why he is in bed.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The situation almost reminds him of his current state.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Beloved,” he tries gaining her attention by reaching out for her. But an erupting pain in his arm stops him. He hisses, recoiling.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But this is enough to gain his wife’s attention, and if looks could kill, he would have been dead on the spot.</em>
</p><p><em>“You </em>idiot<em>,” she growled. </em></p><p>
  <em>Dimitri blinks in surprise. The two argue like a normal couple occasionally, but it is rare that they are ever as angry as Byleth is right now.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Be—Beloved?” He questioned.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“You are an idiot, Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd.” She repeats. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>“I’m sure you are correct, but I don’t know why you are saying it.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Byleth sighs, running a hand down her face. “You wouldn’t remember it, apparently you hit your head pretty bad. You went riding with Ashe, remember? According to him, you fell off your horse and were knocked unconscious.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri finds himself remembering the ride partially.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“So now you have a concussion and fractured shoulder, congratulations!” Byleth, who is supposed to be angry at him, finds his hand and grips it anyway.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri flattens his lips. “I’m sorry,” is all he can say.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Byleth sighs. “It’s not your fault. You gave me quite a heart attack, despite not having a heartbeat. But I was assured rather quickly that you were fine.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri squints in confusion. “Then why are you angry?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“I—I’m not, I—” She cuts off her words with a sigh. “Just… Goddess you are clumsy.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri chuckles despite the pain that comes from it. “Well, I am sorry for being an oaf.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She tries to hide it, but Dimitri hears her chuckle. Wordlessly, she goes to the other side of the bed and scoots in next to him. Her head instinctively finds itself on his chest. “What am I going to do with you?” She asked. “The children were worried, even though I told them you would be fine.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“I’ll have to apologize to them as well, then.” He decided. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Apologies only get you so far,” Byleth retorted. “Maybe next time, try not to get yourself hurt, alright?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri smiles before nuzzling his chin against her head. “I will do my best.”</em>
</p>
<hr/><p>“That boar is a damn idiot.”</p><p>Well, at the very least Dimitri is pleased to see the ambush hasn’t affected Felix in the slightest.</p><p>After several days of hemming and hawing over whether or not he had the courage to visit his friends, he finally found himself there. The group was in a smaller infirmary that the knights used on the other side of the castle, still healing.</p><p>He was thankful to see his friends were fairing much better than he had. Sylvain had made a complete recovery by this point, showing no sign that he was a victim of such an attack. Ashe was also nearing a full recovery, his concussion nearly gone, and was staying in the infirmary a little longer as a precaution.</p><p>Felix and Dedue could have been faring better, but they were doing better than Dimitri was, to say the least. Felix’s nose had healed by now, but Dimitri noticed the slight crookedness at the bridge from the break. His chest was still wrapped, telling Dimitri that he was still recovering from the rib breaks, and his arm was still fully casted from the burns.</p><p>Dedue was one of the strongest people Dimitri knew; he could be hanging on by a thread and somehow force his body to do something. And now was no exception. His back was hunched from the strikes to it, bandaged tightly, but he tried to keep his posture straight. And despite his completely shattered leg, an injury that Dimitri was sure would haunt him for the rest of his days, he was still forcing himself to walk with the assistance of a crutch.</p><p>“We are aware of your feelings on his Majesty, Felix,” Dedue finally replied as he poured a cup of tea for Ashe. The silver haired archer thanked him with a nod before reapplying a cool washcloth to his head.</p><p>“Trust us, you say it every day,” Ashe adds.</p><p>Felix looks like he is about to protest, but Sylvain grips his hand. “Just leave it be, Fe,” he begs, using his other hand to rub his head.</p><p>Felix narrows his eyes. “You haven’t been sleeping, have you?”</p><p>Sylvain straightens his posture and sighs. “Well for one, I am still not used you not being there with me, and two…” Sylvain trails off, sighs, and looks the other way.</p><p>Dedue catches on. “I don’t think any of us have been getting a good night’s rest, Felix,” he says.</p><p>“Well than what’s the damn point of us staying in this cramped room,” Felix snaps. “If none of us are getting the rest we need, why can’t I just sleep where I want.”</p><p>“Maybe because you nearly lost your arm and need to be monitored?” Ashe replies. “How many times have you been caught sneaking out to go ‘train’ again?”</p><p>“Four.” Dedue responds.</p><p>“I thought it was three,” Sylvain says.</p><p>Felix huffs. “No, it’s four.”</p><p> Sylvain’s head snaps back to Felix. “You tried sneaking out <em>again?</em> When did this happen?”</p><p>“Last night.” The other three respond.</p><p>Dimitri sighs along with Sylvain. But he isn’t surprised in the slightest; sounds just like Felix.</p><p>“What the hell am I going to do with you?” Sylvain asks.</p><p>“You are the one that decided to court him,” Dedue mutters.</p><p>“What the hell is with you and Ashe being so brazen lately?” Sylvain asks.</p><p>“Being locked in an infirmary with Felix for so long will do that to you,” Ashe responds.</p><p>Sylvain sighs again, Felix looks like he is about to burst at the seams with anger, but the door opening halted them. Dimitri turned to see Annette, Mercedes, and Ingrid walk into the room.</p><p>“For the <em>goddess’s sake</em>, Dedue!” Annette scolds, “What point of <em>bed rest</em> do you not understand?”</p><p>“Apologies, Annette, but Ashe needed—”</p><p>“Whatever Ashe needs can be done by someone else! No offense, but you are too nice for your own good, Dedue.” Annette turns to look at the others. “Why did no one stop him?”</p><p>“You think we can stop him?” Sylvain responds.</p><p>Annette looks like she is going to reply, but eventually she shuts her mouth and crosses her arms. “Touché, Gautier.”</p><p>Dimitri hears Mercedes sigh. “Dedue, I know you want to help, but you really should be minimizing how often you get up. It isn’t good for your back or leg.”</p><p>Dedue looks away. “Apologies.”</p><p>For a while, it seems like the rest of the gathering is going to go pretty tame; well, as tame as this group can be. Mercedes does a usual checkup with Dedue, remarking that he is recovering nicely, before moving onto Ashe.</p><p>“How is Achaeus faring, Ingrid?” Ashe asks.</p><p>Achaeus, Ingrid’s trusted Pegasus, was yet another being that Dimitri owed his life to if he were to ever wake up. Apparently, after the ambush, Ingrid and Achaeus flew all the way to the Monastery to inform Byleth of what happened. The trip from here to Garreg Mach, which normally took three days if you are lucky via Pegasus, was done in a day by Ingrid and her steed. Once she was informed, Flayn then warped Byleth back to Fhirdiad so she could be with Dimitri. Ingrid and Achaeus had to stay at the Monastery for a few extra days to recover from the trip.</p><p>“He’s doing better, thank you,” Ingrid replies. “I’m going to let him have a long break just to be safe, but he is expected to recover fully.”</p><p>“Good to hear—”</p><p>Ashe’s response is cut off by the soft sound of Mercedes cursing under her breath. Dimitri looks over to see her fumbling with some medical tools in a small, portable case. He recognizes it being in his room in one of the few times he has been in there.</p><p>“Mercie, please don’t over work yourself,” Ingrid stands and places a hand on her shoulder.</p><p>“I’m… I’m doing everything I can,” she replies. “But I am fine, really. My hands just get numb after using healing magic as much as I have been. I’m just not used to it yet; they haven’t had to deal with this since the war.”</p><p>Is that truly just how much Mercedes was healing him? Comparable to a <em>war?</em></p><p>“It’s not even worth it,” he hears Felix mutter.</p><p>Despite his attempt to be subtle, everyone hears. “Why would you even say something like that?” Annette yells.</p><p>“You don’t have a say in the matter,” Felix growls. “You weren’t there. You didn’t see how he threw himself in front of us, taking all those damn blows. He was asking for death, and we know it.”</p><p>“Asking for death? More like <em>saving your life!”</em> Annette retorts.</p><p>“Felix, you know damn well he wasn’t asking for death,” Ingrid adds. “You think he wanted to throw away his life? Leave his wife and kids behind? Of course not, but he couldn’t bear to see you lose your life either.”</p><p>Mercedes tries to stop them. “Everyone please—”</p><p>“You think I don’t fucking know that?” Felix snaps. “I know that damn boar, I know how self-sacrificing he is. Everyone in this damned room knows it. How many attacks did he save Dedue from in Duscur? How many times did he get punched by Miklan trying to defend Sylvain? He’s just about put himself in danger for every person in this room.”</p><p>“Then why say it’s not worth it?” Ingrid has tears forming in her eyes. “Why would you even say such a thing?”</p><p>“Because you all know he’d do it again!” Felix screams, pushing Sylvain’s hand aside. “If by some fucking miracle he survives this, you really think he wouldn’t throw his life away again?”</p><p>Sylvain tries to grip Felix’s shoulder as the black-haired swordsman stands. “Felix—"</p><p>“That stupid boar,” Felix growls. “So high and mighty, protecting others with his own life. You’d imagine he would stop and think for a second that maybe he shouldn’t throw his life away. Maybe he should stick around for his kid’s sake. Maybe he should think about how his wife—<em>our friend</em>—would react. Maybe he would realize that maybe we <em>don’t</em> want him to protect us, because we don’t want to think that <em>we </em>are responsible for keeping him on death’s door. But no! The thought probably never crossed his mind!”</p><p>The room is dead silent. Dimitri can do nothing but stare at Felix, noticing the slight glimmer in his eyes.</p><p>Felix throws his good arm out. “See? Your silence is confirming everything I already know.”</p><p>Before anyone can respond, Felix heads for the door. “Felix please,” Mercedes pleads.</p><p>“I’m going to train.” Is all Felix says before he slams the door behind him.</p><p>No one says anything for a few moments. The silence in the room is deafening.</p><p>Sylvain is the first to speak. “Guys, I’m sorry, Felix… He—”</p><p>“It’s alright, Sylvain,” Ashe stops him. “We understand. We are all stressed out. It’s only natural he is too.”</p><p>“But still, he didn’t—”</p><p>“We know Felix, Sylvain.” Dedue adds. “He holds everything in and then lets it all out in one fell swoop. We knew it was coming, and we know he doesn’t mean any harm.”</p><p>Sylvain lets out a mournful chuckle. “You got that right.” He rubs his temple. “Well, I’d better go get him, before he hurts himself.”</p><p>Sylvain leaves without another word. The room is silent once again.</p><p>“Mercedes,” Dedue breaks that silence. “Is… Is his Majesty recovering at all?”</p><p>Silence again. “Like I said,” she says regretfully. “I am doing everything I can.”</p><p>Dimitri knows Felix. He knows everyone in this room. He had guesses to how they would react to this whole situation, and being here proved it. They all blamed themselves for what happened to him. They were all beating themselves up over the decision he made to protect them.</p><p>He decides its better off, for his sanity, that he doesn’t visit his friends again.</p>
<hr/><p>
  <em>Dimitri had witnessed many horrible things over his twenty-eight years of life. He had borne witness to unspeakable tragedies, devastations, and war. One would think that at this point, there was nothing that could scare him.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Above all else, the birth of his son terrified him the most.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>When Byleth had told him of her pregnancy, elated was too weak of a word. He was the happiest he had ever recalled being.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But that was short lived. It seemed that fate never wished to make things easy for them, because Byleth’s pregnancy was one of the hardest things either of them had to go through.</em>
</p><p><em>Dimitri had known about the symptoms of pregnancy; he had been warned about them since he was a child. </em>Your future wife will have to deal with a multitude of things<em>, </em>carrying your child<em> his nannies once told him. But nothing could prepare him for the pain and suffering Byleth would go through carrying their child.</em></p><p>
  <em>Morning sickness was a nightmare. Dimitri hated whoever came up with that term; it isn’t even true most of the time. Byleth threw up at all times of the day; just after waking, after meals, before bed… Constantly. Dimitri did what he could, he was there to hold her hair out of her face as she vomited, made her tea for nausea, but there was only so much he could do.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Other types of pain were also prominent during this time. Headaches and migraines were a common occurrence, something that Dimitri dreaded. As someone who suffered from frequent migraines, he would never wish them upon anyone. And now, seeing his wife deal with them when she never had before, it was painful to watch. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>The fatigue was something they both had to learn from. Despite what her five-year slumber and her hatred of mornings, Byleth was an active person. She was always running around, doing something. But now, naps were frequent, and even when she would wake, she was still tired. Dimitri and Byleth always had a good routine; they had things they always had to do and divided the work evenly. But now, Byleth was too tired to do most of it. Dimitri didn’t mind doing more work, of course, anything to make his wife’s pregnancy easier. But piling more work on top of all of the kingly duties he already had… it was a difficult balance, to say the least.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But despite the hardship, there were some things that kept the two happy during the pregnancy. Byleth found out she was pregnant just a few, short months after they adopted Adelia, who only made the pregnancy more enjoyable. Her absolute elation at the thought of having a younger sibling was one of the cutest things Dimitri had ever seen. Conceiving a child after just adopting one was something they admittedly did not plan, but they couldn’t be happier with the outcome.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And when the baby kicked for the first time… Dimitri can’t recall a time Byleth was so happy. She was in tears, running her hands along her swollen stomach, desperate to feel more signs of life. For months, she had been concerned about the baby’s lack of kicking, especially considering that she herself was born stillborn. But when the baby gave the first signs that he was really in there, all those fears washed away. Some of the happiest times during the pregnancy were just when she and Dimitri had the opportunity to feel the baby kicking.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But then the baby kicked and broke three of Byleth’s ribs.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri just about erupted into a full-blown panic the moment he found out. At the time, he was in a meeting with some minor lords from the Kingdom, when a cleric came and informed him of Byleth’s condition. He rushed to the infirmary to be with her as quickly as he could.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>By the time he had reached her, Mercedes and some other clerics were working on healing her. Dimitri saw the dried tear marks on her cheeks, and noticed how her hands shook as she reached out for him. To see his wife so broken was something that he always hated seeing. But she was the one that consoled him, even through all of her pain.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The baby having a Crest of Blaiddyd was the only explanation for the incident. According to Mercedes, babies have been known to crack ribs in the womb, but completely breaking was another story. According to records and word of mouth from older servants, broken bones while pregnant was common among the Blaiddyd line. But breaking three ribs with one kick was something that had never been heard of before.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>So, it was theorized rather quickly that Dimitri and Byleth’s child would be the first holder of a Major Crest of Blaiddyd in hundreds of years.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>When the word got out, people from throughout the Kingdom were elated. Nobles and commoners alike were celebrating the news.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But Dimitri didn’t give a damn. If anything, he wished the child bore no Crest so it would cause his wife less pain. He had always hated the Crests and how they deemed a person worthy. His unborn child already meant the world to him, Crest or none. And now that people were placing his child on a higher pedestal, simply because he possessed a Major Crest? If anything, it infuriated Dimitri; was his child only now worth celebrating, now that they had a Crest?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And then Byleth went into labor a few weeks after the incident.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Let it be known that Dimitri would have done anything—anything— to take his wife’s pain away. He would have killed for it, if that is what it required.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Byleth was in labor for well over twenty-four hours, and Dimitri didn’t leave her side for one minute of it. He was sure to keep track of her rapid breathing, wipe her head clear of sweat, and help her keep track of her contractions. The midwives kept telling her what a great job she was doing; but as far as Dimitri was concerned, every single moment was agonizing.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Dima,” she cried at one point.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“What do you need, Beloved?” He responded quickly.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She hesitates for a moment, but her heavy breaths fill the air. “If… If I don’t make it—”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Don’t say things like that,” he quickly cut her off. “You are going to be just fine, and so is our little one. I promise…”</em>
</p><p><em>But as the hours went on, Dimitri began to wonder if that would truly be the case. And his ghosts didn’t make it any easier. </em>This is your fault<em>, they would tell him.</em> This is your spawn’s doing. Your bloodline is cursed, you should have known this would happen. You should have known you would kill her.</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri almost listened to them. He wanted to listen to him. They were right, after all. But he wouldn’t let himself. He had to keep himself together. His wife was going through one of the hardest labors he had ever witnessed, and he would not make this about himself. She was all that mattered right now.</em>
</p><p><em>The hours eventually amounted into a day, and their child still hadn’t arrived. At this point, Dimitri is just barely hanging on. His ghosts were chipping away at him like a sculptor trying to salvage a piece beyond saving. </em>He would kill her<em>, he thought. He was actually going to kill his wife, all because he had to get her pregnant. </em></p><p>
  <em>The child probably would grow to hate him anyway. How could they not? The moment they found out what he had done, how many people he killed, they would hate him. It was only a matter of time until Adelia grew to despise him, and the same would happen to this child. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Byleth was growing weaker by the minute. She was so strong… So strong. But he knew it was only a matter of time until she couldn’t take it any longer. How much longer would she last? Would she deliver their child or would she take them with her? Every possibly of this situation ending poorly, Dimitri thought it, and he feared it more than anything he ever feared before.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But the moment he heard the sounds of the wailing infant, all of that silenced. </em>
</p><p><em>He supposed it was cliché to say; he had heard the same thing from everyone who has ever had children. But he couldn’t deny it if it was true. The moment he heard the cries, when he saw his wife cradle the small little bundle, </em>his son<em>… He was in love.</em></p><p>
  <em>As Byleth held their child, he brought a hand out and hovered over him. The little bundle gripped onto his finger nearly instantly. Dimitri let out a weak chuckle at the sight.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“His eyes match yours, Dima,” Byleth remarked. That definitely wasn’t the only thing that matched; the child looked just like him, blonde hair, blue eyes, they were practically clones. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>It’s amazing how Dimitri had only just met his son and was already willing to give him everything.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Dima, don’t cry,” Byleth said, taking a hand out from under their child and wiping his face. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri hadn’t even noticed he was crying. He brings his own hand up and wipes the tears alongside his wife. “These are happy tears, Beloved.” He says, voice cracking. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri thought that he couldn’t get any happier, but that was quickly proven false when Adelia was given the chance to meet her brother. Watching the normally energetic and full of life Adelia turn into a careful, but still excited girl upon seeing Mikhail… it was enough to make Dimitri’s heart melt.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Papa, don’t cry!” Adelia said at one moment. Dimitri chuckles again, having once again not noticed he was crying. “Mama, why is he sad?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“He’s not, Addie,” Byleth chuckles. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri places a hand on Adelia’s back, smiling, before looking back to his wife and Mikhail. “I can’t be sad when I have everything I need right here.”</em>
</p>
<hr/><p>“Wait, you <em>really</em> never cursed Itha Plains?”</p><p>“Nope,” Sothis says with a huff.</p><p>Dimitri raises an eyebrow, almost doubting the claim. “Legends always said you had, that’s why there are so many beasts there.”</p><p>“Legends are called that for a reason,” Sothis says. “Whatever beasts live there just showed up and did their thing. I had nothing to do with it.”</p><p>Dimitri hums in surprise. His Uncle Rufus had been given control of Itha Plains while his father was still alive. Dimitri didn’t get to see his uncle much during that time, but the few times he did, he always complained about the beasts that roamed the fields. It was a long-held rumor that the fields were cursed by the goddess, causing the beasts to appear.</p><p>“You humans always try to find ways to connect <em>everything</em> back to me.” Sothis groans, “Can’t things just, I don’t know, happen? The world is kind of crazy, it can do that.”</p><p>Dimitri chuckles. “I suppose you’re right…”</p><p>Before Dimitri can say anything else, two small figures blur right past him and the goddess. He blinked a few times; the figures walked right through him, something that he was still not used to. When he snapped out of his stunned state, he looked to see what the figures were.</p><p>“Come on, Mikhail!” Adelia said with a smile. “You gotta keep up!”</p><p>The toddler run after her as quick as his legs could carry him. “Coming!”</p><p>Sothis giggles. “Huh, I didn’t know that they were allowed to wonder the castle on their own.”</p><p>“<em>They’re not,</em>” Dimitri sighed. The castle, while their home, was far too large for the children to be running around by themselves. Mikhail, especially, was too young to be wondering unattended. Where the hell was their nanny?</p><p>Huffing, Dimitri began to jog after his children. He knew he couldn’t do anything, but at the very least <em>someone</em> could keep an eye on them.</p><p>For having such short legs, his children sure were in a hurry to get somewhere. They had made it all the way to the end of the hall before they finally went into a room, shutting the door behind them. Before following, Dimitri looked at the door, recognizing it as the one of his office. What business did they have in there?</p><p>Finally following, Dimitri phased through the door just in time to see his daughter use a fire spell to light the fireplace. “Seriously?” Dimitri sighed. She knew she wasn’t supposed to use magic unattended. While he was impressed that she actually hit her mark, a misfire could have set the whole castle on fire. Once he woke up, he would be sure to give their nannies a stern talking to.</p><p>“Whatcha wanna read today, Mikhail?” Adelia asked, moving to the bookshelf on the other side of the wall. He loved his children with every fiber of his being, but he just didn’t understand them sometimes. They had a perfectly acceptable book collection in their playroom. Even then, they were still learning how to read; Adelia could read somewhat, but Mikhail hadn’t learned at all yet. Why chose from the higher reading level books in his office?</p><p>Mikhail stood on his tippy toes, trying to get a view of the books on the higher shelf. After looking for a few minutes, he points to one on a higher shelf. “Looks pretty,” he says.</p><p>Smiling, Adelia reaches as high as she can to grab the book. Bending down, Dimitri gets a look at the cover. <em>A History of Trade Routes Between Gaspard and the Adrestian Empire.</em> What an engaging read for a three and seven year old.</p><p>After flipping through the pages briefly, Adelia nods, and jogs over to the fire place. She sits down on the plush carpet, trying to get comfortable.</p><p>But Mikhail does not follow. Instead, he walks over to the desk where Dimitri would sit to do his work. Draped over the back of his chair is his blue cape, the same one he wore during the war. He commonly left it in his office on accident after long days.</p><p>Small hands gripping the cape, Mikhail tries to pull it off, struggling. As heartbreaking as the scene is, Dimitri can’t help but laugh a little; his son is nearly drowned out from the cape’s side.</p><p>Adelia glances over, noticing her brother’s struggle. “Oops, sorry, I forgot!” She says as she runs over to the chair as well. Together, the two children manage to get the cape off of the chair and, carrying it together, bring it in front of the fire place.</p><p>As Adelia gets comfortable, she instructs her brother to sit and beings to wrap the cape around the two of them. They are practically engulfed by the cape’s size, but look completely snug together. “You ready for me to start reading?” Adelia asks.</p><p>Mikhail nods, gripping the cape close to his chest as his sister begins to read. Dimitri can tell right away that his daughter is making the story up as she goes along, not being able to read the contents of the book. But regardless, her brother seems engaged as the two listen to the wild story she has prepared.</p><p>It is only then when Dimitri realizes what the children were doing. During the weeks when Byleth was away at the monastery, Dimitri would sometimes find himself working late into the night in this office. When that would happen, his children would always seek him out, asking a similar set of questions each night. This would range from being asked to get tucked in or a late-night snack, but most often they would ask to be read to. Byleth had made a habit out of it when she was here.</p><p>And Dimitri would comply every time. He often would bring them to bed, sit them down similar to how they were sitting right now, and read to them until they fell asleep. They were trying to mimic that experience in this very moment.</p><p>Grievously, Dimitri bent down onto the floor, sitting next to his children as Adelia continued to ‘read’ her story. He should be doing this, not her. But his children were doing everything they could to make it seem like he was with them.</p><p>Dimitri just listens. He sits there and listens to his daughter’s story.</p><p>Just when Adelia seems to be getting to the climax of her story, Dimitri notices Mikhail shift under his cape. “Addie?” He says sheepishly, hiding his face in the cape.</p><p>“Hm?” Adelia stops. “What’s the matter?”</p><p>Mikhail doesn’t answer for a moment. His glossy eyes can just barely be seen over the cape. “I wish Papa could read to us.” He finally says.</p><p>Adelia looks down at her brother, her face mournful for a moment. “I know,” she admits. “He will soon.”</p><p>“But Mama said he was hurt bad…” Mikhail says.</p><p>“Yeah, but he will get better,” Adelia tries to smile.</p><p>Mikhail doesn’t look so sure. “Mama looked really sad.”</p><p>Adelia hums. “It upset me too,” she says, hugging her knees. “But remember what Mama said? We have to be strong.”</p><p>Mikhail doesn’t say anything. Dimitri notices Adelia flatten her lips, a clear sign that she is thinking. “We have to be strong, but we will never be as strong as Papa. You’ve seen what he can do! Don’t you remember when the wheel to the carriage fell off? He lifted it all by himself so it could get fixed!”</p><p>Mikhail gives a small smile as his sister continues. “He can pick up me, you and Mama easy! And remember watching him fight? He can beat Uncle Felix! No one can beat Uncle Felix.”</p><p>Mikhail nods, smile wider.</p><p>“See? Papa is so strong; he will be just fine.” Adelia says. “But we gotta say strong for him too? Mama said we will get through this together, okay?”</p><p>Mikhail looks down at his lap, tiny hands still holding onto the cape like a lifeline. “Okay.” He finally says.</p><p>Adelia smiles before hugging her brother, who returned the hug right after.</p><p>Dimitri feels tears forming in his eye, but is smiling. Childlike optimism was an amazing thing, and his daughter was the best example of it he had ever seen. “Don’t worry you two,” he says. “I am staying strong. Thank you for staying strong for me. I’ll be up soon. I promise, I will do everything in my power to get back to you.”</p><p>They don’t respond, of course, but saying the words makes Dimitri feel somewhat better.</p><p>“You and Byleth raised two great children,” Sothis remarks.</p><p>Dimitri is startled by her voice; he hadn’t noticed she had followed him. Was she here the whole time?</p><p>“We did,” he says simply.</p><p>Dimitri and Sothis continue to watch over the children until their nanny finally finds them, fast asleep, wrapped in his cape.</p>
<hr/><p>
  <em>Occasionally, Byleth would accompany Dimitri to Duscur.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>These trips weren’t easy for either of them, he had to admit. He typically spent at least two months in Duscur at any given time to help rebuild. Being away from the throne for that long was difficult enough, but Byleth being away from the Church for that long was even more so. And these trips were full of nothing but work, assisting the people of Duscur with the rebuilding of their nation.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But the trip was worth it every time. Dimitri had promised Dedue long ago that he would bring the land back to its former glory, and to see that actually happening brought him more joy than he had words for. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Byleth was able to accompany him on this particular trip. It was actually encouraged by Seteth, to Dimitri’s surprise, to show that the church supported the rebuilding of Duscur. Even though he tried tirelessly to remove bigoted thoughts towards Duscur and their people, it was a difficult challenge to overcome, and one Dimitri was still working on. The church showing their support, Seteth and Dimitri hoped, would hopefully open the minds of others to assist with the rebuilding of the country.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>They were about a week into their trip and already were rather productive, if Dimitri said himself. Foundations for houses were built, work on the harsh fields began, and more people were returning to the country after years of running from it. For the first time since the tragedy, Dimitri was seeing the country somewhat resemble what it once was. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>But Dimitri also took the time in Duscur to allow him and Byleth to go back to their roots. During his time at the academy, he would often train the orphans residing there in basic sword skills. Unfortunately, since taking the throne, he didn’t get to have that opportunity as often as he would like. But in Duscur, where the amount of orphans residing there made his heart ache, he could never say no. This also gave Byleth that same opportunity to teach again, since that was all but taken away from her since becoming Archbishop. It was truly the perfect solution. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>This was their first lesson of the trip, and they just finished teaching basic swings and blocks. Now, they were working on stances and starting to practice sparing. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Just after straightening out a young boy’s stance, Dimitri notices another boy knock his sparring partner off of her feet. The young girl let’s out a yelp as she grips onto her knee, whimpering and shaking from the sudden impact to the ground.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Cursing, Dimitri walks over to the pair. He quickly addresses the young boy, warning him to be more careful and to find another partner, before bending down to the young girl. “Are you alright?” He asks.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The girl shakes her head. “My knee… It hurts.” She says.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri looks down at her knee. He can see through her small hands that it is bleeding; just a small scrape, but to a child a much more serious injury.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Trying to comfort the child, Dimitri smiles. “I see; come then. Let us get this patched up.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The little girl’s green eyes find his single blue one before she nods. Once the girl is back on her feet, Dimitri takes her hand and the two begin to walk over to the side of the arena, where a small first aid kit awaits.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Once they make it to the side of the arena, Dimitri props the girl up on the short, brick fencing to get a better look at her knee. It is just a scrape, as he initially thought, but he remarks on it anyway. “You are a very brave girl for having to deal with this injury. What is your name?” He asks.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The little girl wipes a tear from her eye before responding, “Adelia.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Adelia… That is a lovely name,” Dimitri smiles as he reaches for the first aid kit. “Well, Adelia, I don’t know faith magic, but I can fix this right up. Can you remain brave for me for a little while longer?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Adelia nods. Keeping his smile, Dimitri begins to rummage through the first aid kit, searching for the cleaning supplies and bandages. As he searches, he notices Adelia stare at him with concerned eyes.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“You have a booboo too,” she finally says.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He was injured as well? Did he cut his face without noticing or—</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Oh.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri points to his eye patch. “This?” Adelia nods. “This is an only injury of mine. I received it many years ago, nothing to worry about.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri continues to look through the first aid kit until he eventually finds the bandages and cleaning ointment. Adelia still stares at his eye ever so intently.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He finds his smile once again. “However… It has been bothering me a little as of late. Must be the weather. Would you mind bandaging it up for me so it can get better?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Adelia nods excitedly. “Good,” Dimitri says. “I have to warn you though, the injury is old and scarred. It might be scary. I know you are very brave, but are you sure you want to see it?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Adelia hesitates, but she eventually nods. “Alright,” Dimitri says as he reaches back behind his head, his fingers finding the knot tying his eyepatch together. When he unknots it, he lets the eyepatch fall into his hands.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri blinks a few times, not used to his eye being visible, before focusing back on Adelia. She stares at his eye with a certain wonder that Dimitri cannot describe. “There we go, is it too scary for you?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Adelia tilts her head, undeterred. “Nope,” she finally says, “Not scary at all.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri grins. “I’m glad,” he says as he passes some extra bandages to the little girl. “Just make sure you do not obstruct my other eye while I tend to your injury, okay?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Adelia nods as she takes the bandages carefully in her hands, gently unrolling them. Once he ensures that she is preoccupied, Dimitri starts cleaning the scrape on her knee. She didn’t even flinch at the contact. As he works, he sees the young girl begin to work on his eye, careful not to obstruct his vision in the other.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>After a few beats of silence, she speaks. “I don’t like fighting,” she mumbles.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“No?” Dimitri asks as he finishes cleaning the wound.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He can see her shake her head out of the corner of his eye. “Fighting is bad. The war hurt lots of people.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri hesitated for a brief moment. This was far from the first time he had heard how the war effected people, and it certainly wouldn’t be the last. And it never got easier.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“It did,” he agrees. He doubted the girl remembered anything about the war; he guessed she was born towards the end of it. But considering how she ended up at this orphanage, just because she had no memories of it didn’t mean that it didn’t affect her.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“That’s why I don’t wanna fight,” she says. “I don’t like it, and I am not good at it.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri flattens his lips. “I understand,” he says. “But you know, you don’t have to fight people. I hope that you will never have to fight unwillingly, but this training can prepare you to protect those you care about.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“There are other people better than me to protect them,” she mumbles. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>“There won’t always be other people to do that,” part of him thinks he shouldn’t be telling a little girl this, but he continues anyway. “Besides, the only way you can get better at it is if you practice.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Adelia sticks her bottom lip out. Dimitri laughs in response. “I’ll tell you what,” he says. “You can practice with me. If you progress, and manage to beat me in a spar, I’ll let you sit out for a class.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He didn’t particularly like bribing the girl, but the trick always worked. Rodrigue used to do the same thing to him when he was young.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She tilts her head. “You mean it?”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Of course.” Dimitri promises. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Adelia taps her chin and hums, contemplating the offer. “Okay, it’s a deal, no take backs!”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri chuckles. “Never.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Good,” she says. “Now stop talking for a little bit. I need to finish bandaging your eye.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And so, he did, and by the end of the class, the whole right side of his face was covered with a poorly wrapped bandage.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But he kept up his side of the bargain. From that day on, he kept training with Adelia for a portion of the training time, practicing sparing with her for the rest of the week. Of course, this form of sparing was just tapping their wooden swords back and forth and fixing her posture every so often, but for a child, it was hard work. And Dimitri had to admit, for someone who didn’t want to fight, she was definitely learning. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>By the end of the following week, Adelia had managed to successfully strike Dimitri with her wooden sword during their spar. Dimitri saw her eyes light up at her hard work, and she quite literally began jumping for joy. “I did it!” She said excitedly.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“You did,” he said, bending down to her level. “Excellent work.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri held up his hand and Adelia energetically high fived it. Dimitri held up his end of the bargain, letting her sit out for the rest of the class. While Dimitri still taught that day, he would go back occasionally to check on how she was doing. He smiled watching her happily kicking her feet as she watched the other children practice.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Things should have slowed down after that. He helped a child come over their fear and better prepared them for the world. But Dimitri just couldn’t stay away. Every morning that a class was held, Dimitri always made it a point to go check on the little girl with the now fully recovered scrape and bright smile. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri couldn’t explain it. He didn’t know why he was so drawn to this child. But as the days went by, some part of him knew there was a connection. There was some kind of bond between them that he couldn’t describe. A bond he never shared with the other children he trained.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He wanted all the orphans he trained to succeed and prosper. He wanted protect them from the harsh world, to give them the love that they were lacking. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>But he wanted to give her everything.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>As their time in Duscur was coming closer to an end, Dimitri knew he couldn’t leave this girl behind. He couldn’t leave her here not knowing what would happen to her in the future. He wanted to be a part of her future.</em>
</p><p><em>He and Byleth hadn’t had children of their own yet. They knew it was something they wanted at some point, but knowing </em>when<em> they were ready was always a struggle. With his duties as a King and Byleth’s as an Archbishop, it never seemed like the right time.</em></p><p>
  <em>But after meeting Adelia, he was ready.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>When he suggested the idea to Byleth, she was hesitant. Dimitri couldn’t blame her; Byleth was always the voice of reason, reminding her husband of the duties they both had. But Dimitri knew these duties would always exist. He remembers hearing at one point that there comes a time when you realize there is never a right time to have children. You just have to take the chance. And this ringed true now more than ever.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Byleth agreed to meet Adelia at Dimitri’s request. The next day, Dimitri saw Byleth talking with the little girl during their class. His heart jumped seeing his wife interact with the girl he had formed such a bond with. Byleth continued to meet with her for the next few days after. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Even though he had been married to her for a few years at this point, Dimitri still had a hard time reading his wife, at times. Sometimes, he would read her like an open book, but other times, he couldn’t tell what she was thinking. And then, all of a sudden, she would do something and it would hit him like a Pegasus.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“It isn’t common for people from Duscur to have middle names, is it?” Byleth asks one day before they retire for the night.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri nods. “Dedue doesn’t have one, I don’t think any of his family did either. I believe they just don’t have them typically in Duscur culture.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“I see,” Byleth replies. “My father never gave one to me; says it was too much he had to remember. And, well, Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd is quite a mouthful.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Very funny,” Dimitri laughs. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Regardless, I don’t think a middle name is needed,” she says. “Adelia Blaiddyd sounds beautiful on its own.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Dimitri doesn’t remember what he was doing in that moment, but he just knows that he stops. Slowly, he turns to his wife, her smile radiant. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Are you… Are you certain?” He asks.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“I am,” she nods. “I can’t leave her here. I can’t describe it, I just…”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She trails off. Dimitri chuckles before wrapping his arms around her. “I know, I feel it too.”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He feels her smile against his shoulder. “Knowing you’re meant to be a parent is a strange feeling,” she agrees. “But I wouldn’t have it any other way.”</em>
</p><p><em>Over the next few days, they officially adopt Adelia. The little girl, his </em>daughter<em>, is so elated to find out. It seems that in addition to Dimitri and Byleth knowing they were meant to be her parents, she knew they were meant to be her father and mother.</em></p><p><em>And for once, his ghosts don’t have anything to say about it. He is a parent; he and Byleth are </em>parents<em> and everything feels so right.</em></p>
<hr/><p>Ingrid convinces Byleth to leave Dimitri’s side.</p><p>Dimitri doesn’t know how she managed it, but Ingrid did.</p><p>While Ingrid was clearly trying her all in the chess game, Byleth seemed distracted, which Dimitri didn’t find surprising. Despite this, Byleth still was beating Ingrid by a mile. Not to criticize Ingrid, but she wasn’t exactly the best chess player. But regardless, Dimitri was thankful she was able to get Byleth out of the infirmary.</p><p>Once Ingrid made another quick play, Byleth sighed and slowly moved her piece, pushing Ingrid in another corner.</p><p>“Drat,” Dimitri hears Ingrid say. “It’s like you’re reading my mind or something.”</p><p>Byleth tried to smile, Dimitri could tell she was, but the result was a small grin that would go unnoticed by Ingrid.</p><p>Pieces continue to move, and Ingrid continues to lose. It was only a matter of time before conversation came about. “I haven’t seen you since I have returned from the monastery,” Ingrid says. “How are you holding up?”</p><p>Byleth is silent and looks down. Ingrid frowns. “I know it must be difficult, but you can talk to me. It’s been hard on all of us.”</p><p>Byleth doesn’t say anything still but nods. Dimitri notices Ingrid’s eyes glisten with some hope. “You don’t have to deal with this alone, is what I am trying to say.”</p><p>“Ingrid…” Byleth says her name quietly. Too quiet; Ingrid doesn’t hear her and continues to speak.</p><p>“Dimitri did the same thing, you know.” She says. Absentmindedly, she moves another chess piece. “After Duscur, he didn’t want to talk to anyone. We tried but… It took him a long time to open back up. I regret that time; I wonder sometimes if I had tried harder, he wouldn’t have suffered so much.”</p><p>Byleth says nothing as she moves another chess piece. Dimitri sees her clench her other fist under the table. “I don’t want the same to happen to you,” Ingrid continues, moving another piece. “All our friends have each other, Mikhail and Adelia have each other. You have been all alone—"</p><p>Chess pieces go flying, the board falling to the floor as Byleth pushes it off of the table. Ingrid looks distraught over the action, Dimitri sees Sothis jump out of the corner of his eye.</p><p>“Byleth—” Ingrid tried to say.</p><p>“I can’t do this Ingrid,” Byleth admits. “It’s like my father, but worse. I hardly eat, rarely sleep; I have barely seen the children since I’ve returned. What kind of mother am I?”</p><p>“Don’t say such things,” Ingrid begs. “You are grieving, it is only natural. It doesn’t make you any less of a mother.”</p><p>“How is it grieving when Dimitri isn’t—when he hasn’t…” <em>died</em>, Dimitri knows she wanted to say.</p><p>“That doesn’t mean you can’t grieve,” Ingrid consoles.</p><p>“You are missing the point!” Byleth snaps. “I am a mess and the worst isn’t yet to come. Dammit, if he does—”</p><p>“Don’t think like that!” Ingrid begs. “You can’t jump to the worst-case scenario. Mercedes is doing everything she can, she will—”</p><p>“Have you seen him, Ingrid?” Dimitri notices his wife’s cheeks stained with tears. “He won’t wake up, he looks sicker by the day, it’s only a matter of time—”</p><p>“Please, Byleth!” Ingrid pleads. “You can’t think like this. Even if the odds look dire, you have to hold onto hope. You know better than anyone that Dimitri has to be fighting, don’t you? He’s probably doing everything he can to come back to you.”</p><p>“I am, Beloved,” Dimitri says, bending down to her. He knows she can’t hear him, but he has to say something. Seeing her this broken is destroying him. “I am doing everything I can to come back to you, Adelia, and Mikhail, I promise.”</p><p>Byleth doesn’t say anything for some time, but Ingrid stays focused on her.</p><p>“Ingrid, if the worst was to happen…” Byleth weeps, “I <em>promised</em>. I promised myself I would make sure my children grew up with both their parents. Dimitri and I lost ours too early… I <em>can’t </em>let that happen to them…”</p><p>From across the table, Ingrid reaches for Byleth’s clenched hand. The knight runs her fingers along Byleth’s knuckles, trying to soothe her former professor. “If the worst was to happen, <em>and it won’t</em>, Adelia and Mikhail will cherish the memories they had with him. I know that the passage of time would never take those beloved memories away.”</p><p>Dimitri noticed Byleth’s hand tense under Ingrid’s. His wife’s next action is slow, nearly missable, but he sees her shake her head.</p><p>“No…” Byleth says it in a whisper.</p><p>Ingrid perks her head up along with Dimitri.</p><p>“Adelia and Mikhail, they will remember Dimitri, I’m sure, but…”</p><p>“Oh my.” Dimitri hears Sothis say. “She finally has the courage to tell someone.”</p><p>Before Dimitri can question what she means, Ingrid asks his wife, “But what?”</p><p>Slowly, Byleth raises her head, her cheeks stained with silent tears. Dimitri sees her trembles worsen, and she swallows.</p><p>“Ingrid, I…” Byleth trails off.</p><p>And then it all clicks for Dimitri. He stands abruptly, eye wide with realization. He didn’t notice; how the <em>hell</em> did he not notice. Only now, everything locks into place. He didn’t notice the way she grips her stomach, how unusually exhausted she was even given the circumstances, how she <em>glowed</em>. He knows what she is about to tell Ingrid, but he listens anyway, hearing the heartbreaking confirmation himself.</p><p>“Ingrid… I’m pregnant.”</p><p>Dimitri was sure if he had a body, he would have thrown up. Even so, he left the balcony to excuse himself as if he was about to. He just had to get out of there. He had to leave or he was surely going to have an episode in Byleth’s presence. Even if she couldn’t see him, he would never do such a thing.</p><p>Byleth was pregnant. <em>Pregnant</em>. With their third child.</p><p>And he left her all alone.</p><p>Once Dimitri had separated himself far enough from himself and Byleth, he lost it. He couldn’t vomit like he wanted to, so he settled on screaming, cursing his own name for leaving Byleth alone to deal with this. With no one able to hear his screams, it wasn’t nearly as satisfying as he would have hoped, but he kept doing it. He kept screaming, nearly weeping, until he was sure his voice would go raw.</p><p>He didn’t notice he was crying until his screams stopped. He noticed his tears glisten as they fell to the grass below. He didn’t notice before, but he had excused himself all the way to the castle’s courtyard. His and Byleth’s bedroom was all the way on the other side of the castle. <em>Damn.</em></p><p>As he tried to wipe his tears, which was difficult since he was still trembling, he noticed that Sothis had followed him. She looked at him mournfully.</p><p>“How long as she known?” His voice trembled.</p><p>“About a month or so,” Sothis responded.</p><p><em>A month.</em> How long was that now? The child must be a few months old at least then, right? Damn it, he wished he could tell how long had passed since his injury.</p><p>“<em>Why then</em>,” Dimitri growled. “Why didn’t you say anything, if you knew this whole time?”</p><p>“It is not my news to tell,” Sothis scolded. “Besides, you knowing would have only caused you more grief. The longer you were unaware, the better.”</p><p>Dimitri stood up, though his legs trembled as if he was a newborn fawn. He was so filled with shock that he nearly couldn’t function. “Byleth has been dealing with this alone for so long… Goddess, the stress it must be causing her, <em>and</em> the baby—”</p><p>“The child is fine, don’t fret,” Sothis intervened. “She is perfectly healthy and developing nicely—”</p><p>“She?!” <em>A daughter</em>. He was having a daughter. Goddess, Adelia had always wanted a little sister.</p><p>Sothis seemed to have caught her mistake and cursed silently to herself. “Yes, yes. Surprise! It’s a bouncing baby girl, but that is not what’s important right now.”</p><p>“Not important?” Dimitri hisses. “My wife is pregnant with our third child and is forced to deal with it alone. How is that not important?”</p><p>Dimitri thinks back to when Byleth was pregnant with Mikhail. If that were to happen again—</p><p>“Listen to me!” Sothis commands. “You cannot work yourself up over this. The situation is terrible, yes, but you worrying about it won’t do anything good.”</p><p>“But I—I can’t—” Dimitri was having a hard time breathing now. His ghosts were screaming at him as he gripped onto his chest, shaking. <em>Your fault</em>, they said.</p><p>
  <em>Your fault. Your fault. Your fault—</em>
</p><p>“Woah, woah, hey!” Sothis yells. “What did I just say? You cannot let this destroy you. You can’t!”</p><p>But the voices didn’t falter. Dimitri’s vision began to blur as he struggled to regain composure.</p><p>“Dimitri, listen to me,” Sothis says. “You told me you would do everything in your power to get back to them, did you not?”</p><p>Dimitri still finds himself heaving but he nods anyway.</p><p>“Then let this drive you,” she says. “Let this be one of the many other reasons for you to pull through this. You will survive; you will do it for Byleth, your friends, your children, and your unborn child.”</p><p>Dimitri wanted to listen to the goddess, listen to reason, but he couldn’t calm himself. The voices only grew louder.</p><p>
  <em>Your fault. Your fault. Your fault.</em>
</p><p>“Dimitri,” she repeats. “Ignore the voices, listen to me.”</p><p>“I—” He can barely stutter.</p><p>“You will survive this,” she says. “Repeat my words! You <em>will</em>.”</p><p>Dimitri still struggles to breathe. He looks to Sothis, sees the determination in her eyes. She meant what she said. Did the goddess truly have that much faith in a horrid being such as himself?</p><p>Goddess or not, she was Byleth’s friend; his wife’s closest companion. She granted Byleth the power to rewind time, to save him and his friends time and time again. But more than that, Sothis was there for Byleth through it all, even if Byleth didn’t know it.</p><p>It didn’t matter that the Goddess had faith in him. But knowing that Byleth’s friend did was enough.</p><p>“I—” He wipes his eye and clears his throat. “I will survive this.”</p><p>He tries to stand up straight, tries to show that he is in control, that his emotions were at bay. He fails miserably, his heavy breathing and tear-filled eye, and his straight posture is not as strong as it should have been.</p><p>But regardless, Byleth’s friend smiles at him.</p><p>“You will.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Angst, drama, ANGST. I love it. Sorry not sorry.</p><p>Writing children is hard :/ idk how kids talk sorry</p><p>Hope everyone's 2021 has been treating them well. It has been treating me just swimmingly; found out that I had an old file saved of my other fix and accidentally deleted the new one. Soooo much progress LOST. Wonderful, just wonderful.</p><p>Title for this chapter comes from the song Take Me Back from Starkid's Black Friday. This is a parody musical, it isn't supposed to have such a good Dimileth song but it DOES. And oh my god I LOVE IT.</p><p>So this chapter is kinda a monster, I've never written a chapter this long lol. I have most of the next chapter planned out, but quite a bit of it needs to be written still. So the last chapter may take a bit. I kind of want to update my other fic sooner rather than later? But honestly losing the file kinda discouraged me. It's been awhile since I've updated it though, so I feel like I should work on it. So I'll update this when I can.</p><p>Hope you enjoy until then :)</p>
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